Blog about having premature ovarian failure and trying donor IVF with my sister's eggs

My sister skyped me just now to tell me her news. She wanted me to know before anyone else, that she is six weeks pregnant. If my pregnancy had continued, I would be one week ahead of her.

This is not the sister who donated her eggs to me, but she is still very precious and is the littlest sister of four girls in our family.

I feel absolutely gutted. This adds to our loss and is another kick in the teeth. I will now be reminded at every step of her pregnancy, of the pregnancy we have lost.

I am very happy for her but so unhappy for us. How can you marry those two sets of emotions? I am struggling.

She also already has a gorgeous little boy which she conceived in a flash two years ago. She has conceived this baby in a blink too. Why is it so hard for some people to get pregnant and easy for others?

I know it sounds childish (pardon the pun) but I feel as if it is now my turn to have a baby, not hers, as she already has one. How dumb is that? I know it is completely ridiculous feeling like that but that’s what I’m feeling right now.

Has anyone else ever experienced this situation and if so how have you dealt with it?


Comments on: "How to be happy for someone when you are sad" (2)

  1. My SIL got pregnant a month before my IVF cycle. On the day I went for my first ultrasound and learned that the baby stopped growing, she had her first ultrasound of a healthy baby.

    My heart hurts all the time. It’s not easy. There’s really no way to deal with it except just to deal. Helpful, right?

    If you ever want to talk, please email me. I’d love to have someone to share with, especially when I think of all that I have left to face, my mom decorating a nursery in her home, a baby shower, mother’s day, etc.


    • Hi Claudia

      I’m so sorry for your loss too. It’s really tough isn’t it? But I find it comforting to know there are other women like you out there in the same situation.

      I am going to have a read of your blog tomorrow and will definitely get in touch after that.

      Take care

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